I'm High, Again

It's about a quarter after one in the morning here in London and I just thought that I'd mention to anyone who cared that I'm high. You heard me, and if you didn't, then fuck you.



Here are some lovely boobies for your enjoyment.

WTF?!: The Sequel

So yeah, as you may have guessed, I wasn't too pleased with the way that design was working out. Too much colour and happiness and not enough of me or myself. Actually the MogBlogged Design is going to enjoy a quiet retirement in it's hometown of my mind. The only problem is that because of it's shortened lifeline, the MogBlogged Design did not have any money saved up for retirement. Which of course means that it'll be dead before the day's over.

Anyways, I'm considering taking on a partner for the website, if you're interested, just hit me up by one of the many means you have of contacting me...

WHAT THE FUCK?

Yes, what the fuck indeed my friends, what the fuck indeed. No, nothing really that drastic, I just changed the layout of my website/blog. ISN'T IT FUN!? Don't start bitching if you see any mistakes and mishaps in the coding or design of the site, as I will say now, that it's still UNDER CONSTRUCTION.
What do you think?

I'm Unemployed Again

I quit my job because the hours sucked, talking to Americans sucked, and the pay sucked. So I'm back on the track to looking for work. Hopefully I'll land the midnight shift at the new gas station that just opened up, then I can get back to the important things in life, like smoking weed and getting drunk at work again.

What's everyone up to?

BTW, if you're going to comment on this post, give me an idea of how often you check to see if I update this place, if a lot of people happen to be stopping by a lot and being disappointed because there's no updates, then I might consider updating it more often.

I'mDrunk

Yeah, I'm drunk, in case you missed the title of the post. The only reason I'm posting about it is because I drank a bottle of wine and I'm so pleased with my new job. Things are actually going quite well, of the 20 or so new recruits at the company I'm probably the best of the bunch. It's a little embarrasing and a bit hard to fit in when the supervisors keep coming by and telling you how well you're doing.

It's a great place to work though, the nice thing about it is the casual dress code. You can wear whatever you feel like. Perhaps on Sunday I'll wear my 'Canadian Pot Smoking Team' shirt. Or maybe I'll not wear pants, I've always wanted to not wear pants in public. I just need to get a pair of boxers that don't have an open fly.

New Jorb

It's been awhile, but I seem to have found one of those jobs that people are always talking aboot. Nothing glamourous or even fun, it's just sitting at a computer and conducting telephone surveys, of course I work through the dinner hour... what the hell did you think?

In other news, I miss my friends in Calgary, and no one online wants to talk to me, I feel so shunned and used.

Surface City :: IRIS

3

Brennus Adel sat in his lavish office at the height of his career. The velvet lined, high backed chair was his perch, but his seat was the CEO and Founder of IRIS. Once it was a small division nestled gently under the careful, nurturing arm of its parent company GenCorp, IRIS grew quickly to become the leader in human genetic modifications. Even so far as to break away from it’s womb and compete on a relatively admirable level with GenCorp. IRIS stood out from its competitors by providing a complete alteration to the human genome of unborn children, at a price of course. Simple alterations like eye or hair colour and physical specifications had been practiced by a number of companies for years, but always on fully adult and mature beings. Tampering with unborn children had been a social taboo in the early days of genetic modifications, IRIS’ propaganda with the help of the waning power of religion had seen to ushering that idea out of the populace’s feeble minds. Not only could the basics of appearance be calculated and altered only several weeks after conception, IRIS promised its customers the academic and social success of their children. It was with this promise and a warlike front of advertising that IRIS was able to build its position as one of the top companies in the field of genetic modifications.

The comm-line on Brennus’ metallic desk chirped itself to life as his secretary’s voice beamed into his office. “Good afternoon Mr. Adel, I’m just informing you that your two o’clock appointment has arrived and is waiting to see you,” the secretary’s sunny disposition was the chief reason why he’d kept her around so long. The fact that she was an excellent assistant didn’t matter at all, it was vastly important for IRIS to project a friendly public face as Brennus was known to be a stern businessman.

“Thank you Ms. Fitzgerald, please see her in.” He sat back and keyed the comm-line into the off position. This was going to be a very important meeting and he wanted absolutely no interruptions. Adel turned his chair to face the double doors leading out of his office. The doors slid swiftly and silently apart as Ms. Fitzgerald guided his appointment into the room. He gazed for a moment, seemingly stuck in a dream; she was striking, wearing a taut black bodysuit that complimented her womanly curves. The woman’s long black hair was pulled tightly back and braided into a long tail. Her pale skin was set off against her full scarlet lips and firm facial features. Brennus’ eyes roamed her cool exterior like a hungry shark intent on its next meal, but he restrained himself; he of all people knew that as vastly beautiful as this woman was, she was twice as lethal.

“Bonjour Monsieur Adel,” the woman’s voice cut through the moments of silence that followed her entrance, she was used to people being stunned when she entered a room and even though Mr. Adel was her employer and had met her on many occasion, she was somewhat surprised at his expression of lust upon her entrance. Brennus faced his assistant and gave her a subtle nod to indicate that she would not be needed further, she thus departed back to her duties and the doors slid closed behind her. He returned to meet the woman in black’s piercing stare and smiled widely.

“Welcome back to IRIS Lyonette,” he offered her a chair and she sat, her poise was graceful yet he knew she remained on guard at all times. “I trust, of course, that your business in Hladir went accordingly?” Brennus knew the answer already from the news reports or course, small talk was just another method in business to test the other party, regardless of the fact that Lyonette had never shown loyalty to anyone but IRIS, but there was no reason to get careless.

She responded concisely as always, Brennus delighted in hearing her voice with its French undertones and subtle sensuality that she projected, “Of course Monsieur Adel, ze President was most cooperative during ze negotiations.” Glorious, she was indeed the perfect person to have handled the job, even in private conference with the one who had given her the order, she never allayed that she had in fact killed the president of Frost Worth Enterprises. In Brennus’ mind she was the perfect dispatcher, a superb individual to carry out, to the letter, any of IRIS’ more sinister dealings. The president of Frost Worth Enterprises had been secretly funding a group that was attempting to gain support in the CORE and Government Inc. for regulation of prenatal gene modifications. Brennus couldn’t have that, so he had sent Lyonette to terminate the problem. Now without a source of funding, the group would dry up quickly and all of the voices in the CORE would return to debating the issues that were in Government Inc.’s best interests, like union deregulations and the like.

“Good,” he replied, there was a genuine cause for celebration tonight, but he was focused on dispatching Lyonette on her next assignment. “Lyonette, do you remember the business with the ‘Les Enfants Vides’ project that took place four years ago?” He watched carefully for her reaction but she merely nodded her affirmation. Slightly disappointed, Brennus continued his explanation, “We’ve recently uncovered a terrible mistake that we need corrected immediately. One of sources indicated that someone outside of IRIS has knowledge of the endeavor. Do you have any idea what would happen if this project was exposed to the media? To Government Inc.?” He gauged her reaction again, again she merely nodded, her attitude was one of disdain. He knew that she wished he would just cut straight to the point so she could get on with her task. Brennus didn’t care to afford her that luxury, she worked for him, and her time belonged to him. In essence he felt a bit of possession towards her, he owned her life, and he lusted after her soul, despite his better judgments. She was much too deadly to be tamed for a lover, and much too dangerous to his reputation.

“This one won’t be as easy; we need him extracted carefully and quietly. It will be all too easy for this to go awry and slap us in the face, so I want your utmost attention devoted to this, we cannot afford any slips here. As always the full resources of the company are at your complete disposal, I suggest you use them as needed. The target’s name is Trix Tremor, find out what he knows and bring him in, I want this assignment completed within the month. You know who he is and his position, if he indeed knows too much it could be fatal to the future of this company! Maintain discretion.” Brennus sat back into his chair, it was easy to bark orders, seeing that they were completed was another matter. His corporate spies would ensure that Lyonette did as she was told.

“It iz my duty to serve ze company Monsieur Adel. Your wishes will be carried out with all ze speed of God behind me.” Lyonette affirmed her orders even though Brennus knew she would not refuse, lethal as she was, loyalty seemed to be high on her honour list.

“Ms. Fitzgerald will have all of the information you need Lyonette. IRIS once again thanks you for your loyalty, good luck with the assignment. As usual, any further attempts to contact myself or other executives will be useless; your job is not officially sanctioned or recognized by our company.” Same old drama, he imagined that every single CEO in Surface City and perhaps the world had delivered that same spill to each and every one of their own shadow agents.

“D’accord Monsieur, au revoir.” Lyonette stood, gave a small bow and proceeded to leave Brennus’ office. He gave her a quick nod goodbye before she turned away from him, informing his secretary to accommodate Lyonette’s needs accordingly.

From the wooden cased, satin-lined humidor on his massive desk he pulled out a sweet smelling cigar and prepared for a quick relaxation before a return to the normal corporate activities of his life. Brennus smiled to himself as he lit up the hefty cigar; this matter would be at a conclusion sooner rather then later, and as for Lyonette, it would likely be her last assignment; she was getting far to knowledgeable to keep around. The secrets about IRIS made her vastly more powerful then Brennus, before too long she would come to realize that and Brennus would be in trouble. Well, he wasn’t going to let that happen, no. This would be her last task.

I hate brown people.

So, I walked into a Mac's convienence store this evening to buy a pack of cigarettes, and of course behind the counter at any Mac's you'll find an asian person who doesn't speak english any better then an infant. These people happened to be of eat indian descent.

I asked for a pack, they ask for ID, so I figured, 'Yeah, that's fine, the age to buy is 19 and I'm 20.' No problem there eh? Wrong. Apparently my health card (which I've been using for the past two years as ID to get into bars and buy cigarettes with) isn't good enough anymore. New government regulations or something, whatever. SO I whip out my birth certificate, a document that was issued twenty years ago several weeks after I was BORN!

Unfortunately this stupid fuck can't seem to understand common sense, so we ended up arguing in front of his store full of customers, and the guy behind me in line trys to explain to the stupid brown shit that a birth certificate is valid fucking ID! He tells me I need a driver's liscense or a passport and I tell that retarded douche that a fucking birth certificate is what you need to get a fucking driver's liscense or passport!!!

This guy's just to damned stupid from licking camel asses all day that I left, that's the end of that store, no more business for him. Listen you stupid cocksucker, you don't come to my fucking country and tell me how old I am. Go back to fucking Pakistan so our southern cousins can kill you.

Worth1000.com

Well, in an effort to work on my photoshopping skills, I've begun entering a number of contests over at Worth1000.com. Still working on trying to win something, in fact over there I'm considered a noob, really need to brush up so I can get me some nice prizes. A faster computer would help with that and a WACOM tablet, but money would also help in getting those items. Anyways, if you're over on Worth1000.com look me up, my username over there is PudgyMoogle of course.

Here's a recent contest image:


Entrants were asked to photoshop this image entitled 'Caddie' in anyway they saw fit. So of course I immediately though of a Cadillac, and over a few hours I put on in. Have a look:


Let me know what you think!

Nintenjol

The new Nintendo Revolution is about as sexy as Angelina Jolie, that gives me an idea.



Enjoygasm!

Happy Independence Day

Well July the Fourth happens to be the United States of America's birthday, so I just wanted to wish all of my southern cousins a happy and safe holiday. Just one question though, when do the arab-americans get their independence from the unconstitutional Patriot Act?

Hope this will give you a better time then you had in 1996!

An Open Letter to Bob Geldof

Dear Sir Geldof,

It has come to my attention that you are the sole being responsible for trying to end poverty on our little planet Earth. While this is certainly a commendable goal, I find your methods to be hypocritical and highly dubious. Here are a few questions that I'd like to have answered

1. Your slogan is 'MakePovertyHistory', how much did it cost to pay the advertising executives to come up with it?
2. Of your amassed £30 Million, how much did you contribute to aid World Hunger?
3. If African debt is relieved and aid increases, what do we do about the corrupt governments? The revolutions?
   
4. Why were there only two African-born performers in the main concerts? Should the poverty stricken nations of Africa not be allowed a chance to "help themselves"?
5. Don't you think that it would be better to give third world countries a hand up rather then a hand out?
6. Will all of the increased profits through record sales that the various artists receive by taking part in this "world changing" event be given to the poorest among us as well?
7. Where did the money for the $3000 worth of gift baskets that each performer received come from?

Why do you seek to demonize the G8 Leaders? Are they not the only ones who can do something about what you've been pushing for? If you can answer a few of these questions for me to ease my head-scratching woes, it would be duely appreciated.

Sincerly,
Kris Mortensen
An Unemployed White Canadian

Image Page!

Here we go kids!

I just spent the last little bit working on a Photos page for you guys. Now you can see what I look like and how I live in all my digital glory. Here's a sample:

Clickage!

The link for the main Photo Page can be found here. And if you don't want to look for this post everytime you want to check out the new images, just look to the right in the sidebar and you can find everything you need.

Enjoy!

28 Sweet Movies

I've decided to start compiling a list of movies that I think everyone should see, fan of the pertaining genre or not. They are listed in no particular order with a quick explaination of why you should see them. They're just personal choices so even though I say that everyone should watch them at least once, I can't guarantee your enjoyment. If you'd like a more thorough synopsis or some more information on any of the movies on this lsit, feel free to contact me.

Movies listed with an asterisk are noted as being especially important or emotionally driven.

• The Godfather (1972)|Why?
  Family, even mob families, are very important.



• The Empire Strikes Back (1977)|Why?
  Han Solo is the most manly roughneck in existance, and he fucked Princess Leia!



• Pukp Fiction (1994)|Why?
  Uncensored graphic violence, racist quips and drugs. And Phil LaMarr!



• Raiders of the Lost Arc (1981)|Why?
  Re: Harrison Ford and Melting Nazis.



• *To Kill A Mockingbird (1962)|Why?
  Atticus Finch defends a black man accused of raping a white girl in the deep American south. (Requires big balls)



• Se7en (1995)|Why?
  Sinning is a great way to pass the time, Kevin Spacey plays a maniac.



• Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)|Why?
  Random comedy is truly genious, and there's a savage killer bunny.



• A Clockwork Orange (1971)|Why?
  Uncompromisingly evil to passively good, and the relationships between old friends and enemies.



• Reservoir Dogs (1992)|Why?
  Best heist movie ever created.



• Donnie Darko (2001)|Why?
  The Bunny



• Sin City (2005)|Why?
  Simply the best comic book-to-movie adaptation ever done.



• Forrest Gump (1994)|Why?
  Great story, great characters, loved the whole integration throughout history.



• Full Metal Jacket |Why?
  Best Vietnam War movie ever. R. Lee Ermey made it a winner.



• Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991)|Why?
  One of the best sequels to a B-Movie ever, great special effects even today.



• Young Frankenstein (1974)|Why?
  Gene Wilder and Marty Feldman



• *Gandhi (1982)|Why?
  Extremely powerful. A must see!



• The Big Lewbowski (1998)|Why?
  The Dude is The Man when it comes to pissing awesomeness and sweating swooze.



• The Exorcist (1973)|Why?
  One of the scariest flicks ever made.



• The Last Remake of Beau Geste (1977)|Why?
  One of the funniest movies that no one's ever seen!



• This Is Spinal Tap (1984)|Why?
  Improvisational comedy at it's absolute best.



• Rain Man (1988)|Why?
  Strong preformance from D.Hoffman, great story.



• Heat (1995)|Why?
  DeNiro and Pacino facing off.



• Night of the Living (1968)|Why?
  Excellent social commentary and flesh-eating zombies.



• Army of Darkness (1993)|Why?
  Best Comedy/Horror movie ever created, some of the best movie quotes of alltime are contained within.



• *Ray (2004)|Why?
  Brilliant acting brings you into the life of Ray Charles.



• *Life is Beautiful (1997)|Why?
  An unforgettable fable that proves love, family and imagination conquer all



• House of Flying Daggers (2004)|Why?
  Amazing cinematography and visual conception. Great fight scenes as well.



• Pink Floyd The Wall (1982)|Why?
  Awesome music, awesome visuals, trippy story.

That's all for now folks.

July the First!

HAPPY CANADA DAY!



I am of course very proudly Canadian, so have a good 137th!

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Surface City :: Lola

Lola

Detective Brock Krumm wasn’t an angry man by nature, but the circumstances of his life brought together all of the proper tools for making him into a rage-filled person. For the last nineteen years he’d been a cop, witness to some of the foulest goings-on of Surface City. Of course he enjoyed his work, keeping the peace and all that jazz, yet he still had inkling in the back of his mind that he might have been cut out for something better in life. The Omni-Guard Academy propaganda does it’s best to shy away from the danger and the rigor of police work, and each year more gullible youths join the force hoping to make a difference. Admittedly there are fewer and fewer ‘upstanding citizens’ willing to make the sacrifice of family, friends and life to join the Guard each year.

‘If only they knew the true meaning of upholding the law,’ Krumm thought with a grimace. Two years ago to the day, he’d lost his partner and closest friend, Miles North. A friendship of seventeen years, snuffed out by one juiced up crazy with a gun. The crazy thug was of course never arrested, never charged, never found, the Guard didn’t even know the name of the murderer of one of it’s own! Ineptness at work. Brock had declined the Guard’s offer of a new partner; there would be no one to replace Miles, not in his mind. So Brock worked alone, trudging through mountains of paperwork from day to day, dealing with the shit that life as a cop always seemed to slam him personally. Unfortunately for Brock, the Surface City Police Force, officially named the Omni-Guard, was a lot like the mafia of old. Once you were in, there was no getting out. It was especially true nowadays, with the Guard’s labour crisis going on. It seemed there just weren’t enough concerned citizens anymore. Or maybe it was the high fatality percentage for rookie cops in this city that kept the new recruits away. Whatever the case, the Guard was short-handed, the perfect time for a veteran detective to be denied his right to retire after so many years of service. ‘Just more shit,’ he thought.

Dt. Krumm took a long drag from his cigarette as he peered out from his surveillance position, the position was in plain sight, Krumm of course was not. He was cleverly hidden away behind a camo-net masque, a nice piece of technology that bends visual light. Any minute now she’d be here; he’d been tracking this particular suspect for the past three months, she wasn’t going to get away again; Krumm was tired of explanations. The suspect’s name was unknown; she wasn’t a registered resident of Surface City as far as Government Inc. was concerned. Probably just an emigrated vestibule that made her way to Surface City hoping for a better life or a bigger score as the case was among thieves. Krumm had taken to calling her Lola, not for any exact reason he could put his finger on, the name just seemed to fit her, sometimes he’d daydream about what she’d be like if she were on his side of the law, and wondered if they could possibly be compatible with one and other. The woman was no fantasy however; she was a ruthless burglar, bent on claiming anything her pretty little mind could fathom. Lola was a remarkably good thief, so much so that she’d evaded the Guard, and in particular, Krumm, at least a dozen times in the past three months. Something about the way she operated was strange. Always alone, always in for the big score (an estimated 2.7 Million S.C.U.P.s and counting). It gnawed at Krumm to no end how she was able to escape every time they got close to her. She always seemed to know when Krumm and his fellow officers were right around the corner. A few times she seemed to vanish into thin air, Krumm was the skeptical type of cop, and he would not believe that he and his fellow Guard were so inept. In fact he refused to believe it.

Krumm glanced over his watch again, an anonymous tipper had informed them of a robbery going down at the Sector A1 Capital Bank, it was a huge target; being the centre of commerce this side of Surface City. The whole job smelled like a suicide attempt, exactly why Krumm figured that his ‘Lola’ would be here. He butted his cigarette and began to grow impatient; stakeouts were never his forte. His watch ticked closer and closer to 0200; the supposed time of the job. Krumm was not usually the type to accept an anonymous tip very often, but the woman on the holo-phone sounded so much like what he’d imagined Lola to sound like. The Guard’s headman Captain Thompson, had denied Krumm’s request for backup. Just like Thompson, the man seemed more bureaucratic then half of the suits down at the CORE. Krumm had always wondered why the captain had a stick up his ass, especially towards him. It all seemed to happen after Miles had been shot. That was a rough year for the Guard as a whole; they lost some 48% of all active duty officers that year. Krumm figured the captain was just as tired of all the bullshit that Surface City throws at us cops as he was. For whatever reasons the captain had for denying him backup, Krumm figured he would just go ahead and deal with it; just like everything else that life’s thrown at him, it stunk.

His thoughts broke suddenly as he noticed a single figure making their way towards the front entrance of the bank. It was quite dark; Krumm saw only a long trench coat loosely wrapped on a tall slim figure. He watched greedily hoping for a chance to catch his ‘white whale’. As the figure stepped into the light he caught a glimpse of long straight black hair and a tight white bodysuit, it was Lola. Krumm clenched his teeth in anticipation, this time she wouldn’t get away; he’d wait for her to go inside and then ambush her while she was in the act. He wasn’t afraid for his own safety; the whole time they’d been tracking Lola she’d never so much as hurt a single Guardsman, it was almost as if she was afraid. Or maybe she was a smart enough girl to keep her nose clean enough that no serious charges could be dropped on her should she ever failed to escape. Krumm didn’t care either way, as long as she wasn’t violent, then he wouldn’t have to be. He watched as Lola crept towards the main bank entrance. She bent over to inspect the doors and suddenly stopped in mid-motion. Krumm froze. Had he been made? Did she know he was watching? Impossible! He was equipped with the latest OG Camo-Net equipment. The small device bends the light around an immobile object, making it practically invisible. There’s no way she would have been able to see him through the dark. No way!

Lola turned exactly to where Krumm was sitting against a wall across the street. She seemed to be looking directly at him, but he didn’t dare move from the stare of those piercing ice blue eyes. There was a glint of pearl as she grinned at him, Krumm blinked and she was gone. He scrambled to his feet but she was no where to be seen. He ran into the street cursing himself under his breath, how had she seen him? How had she known? As he looked back to his previous location beside the wall he couldn’t even see the Camouflage Generator, a great hunk of smooth silver technology and it was camouflaging itself too well to be seen. So how had she known?! Krumm rubbed his eyes with both bewilderment and rage, wondering where to proceed from here he cursed himself under his breath again. As he reopened his eyes he noticed something on the ground, it was glowing bright red-orange but was quickly fading into the blackness of the night.

“Damnit!” He cursed, “You got me this time Lola, my own fault, but you got me.” He yelled into the blackness, being the commercial district that it was, and being that it was two o’clock in the morning, his rage fell on deaf ears. He bent down to pick up the fading ember of his cigarette, how could he have been so stupid? In the back of his mind however, he knew that he would catch Lola eventually, he just didn’t know when or how. Or even if it would cost him his life. Grim thoughts filled Dt. Krumm’s mind as he packed up the camo equipment and lugged it to his car four blocks east. This was not going to be easy to explain to Capt. Thompson. He’d messed up, made a stupid rookie mistake that he could have prevented if he had the sense. Krumm tossed the equipment onto the passenger seat of his vehicle violently. He got in and tried unsuccessfully to calm himself down.

“Another shitty day on the job since I lost you partner…” Krumm put away the photograph of his departed friend, suppressed his rage and made his way back to the CORE. Then the rain started.

Surface City :: More than a Mouthful

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Update

This is an update post.

I am high.

Drag

Just another little something I wrote in fifteen minutes. As always I didn't proof-read or correct any grammar. So fuck you.

My knuckles flexed on the leather bound steering wheel. The engine growled fierociously beneath us like a hungry predator, waiting. I revved the beast and watched the gauges on the dash flick to life. Opposite me in the lane sat another predator, it's chrome grill glinted in the moonlight. The other car revved to match my own actions. I could see the driver across from me, the moonlight sprang from his teeth as he sneared towards me. I returned my gaze forward, adrenaline flowing, I was ready. The only thing between us was a girl hold a blazing scarf. Seconds felt like hours as they dripped away quietly, the only sound was our dueling motors.

The scarf fell and immediately rubber gripped road and we flew off together. Streetlamps whizzed past, I watched the speedometer climb steadily, not fast enough. I pumped the clutch and upshifted, speed came easier, but it seemed my rival was yet faster. His beast streaked ahead of mine, a streak of yellow thunder. He passed the finish line first, the adrenaline faded into fear. I stopped the car, he approached quickly, an entourage of thugs behind him. The smell of exhaust hung heavy in the atmosphere as I extricated myself from the vehicle.

"You lose, Mr.Bradley," his reply was smug, and his look was deadly.

I lost. My car was gone now, it was over. He offered his hand to me, expecting only the keys to my beast. The one constant in my life was now going to be taken from me. NO! Not this way, that car was my life. In an instant I found my hand on the blade of my knife. The knife itself had found its way into the rival's stomach. Another flash and his thugs were on me, blood gave way to darkness and pain. It was over...

No need to worry about my car anymore.

'Shrooms

So, a couple of nights ago I tried mushrooms, and I'm not talking about the Portobello kind you buy at the supermarket either. It was to say the least an interesting experience, although the ones that we got were not very effective, we still had a good hallucinating time.

I don't recommend going on shrooms in a dark house with dark hallways and creaking floorboards, it's just not a very smart thing to do if you like to keep your wits about you. The house across the street was pretty frightening to say the least, not to mention the spirit of the tortured young girl my friend kept on seeing down the hallway towards the bathroom. It's really tough to put a shrooms trip into words that a non-user can understand.

So if you didn't understand anything I just said, well that's just plain too bad for you. I'll probably be trying them at the next opportunity, as we had a really great time, even if it was the scariest few hours of my life.

Something or other.

Just felt like writing, so here:

"Clouds flew lazily overhead, soaring through the distant blue sea that was the sky. It was a summer afternoon, the air was warm but not quite hot, just the way we liked it, Frankie and I. Mother came out of the house with a tall cool glass of lemonade, Frankie ran towards her as usual, huffing and puffing and wagging his tail. My best friend was a dog, I'm not one to admit it openly, but it wasn't something I was ever ashamed of.

"Mother shooed my best friend away as she brought me a glass of the pale yellow elixir. I drank quickly, taste wasn't an idea in my mind, mother frowned at her hard sweetening work gone to waste. I knew she wouldn't be upset long. Frankie stuck his snout into the glass, trying to grasp that last bits of flavour with his tongue. We laughed at his attempts, it was the happiest time of my life."

I turned now to the listener of my tale, a young pretty girl, bound and gagged to a chair. The single lightbulb swung slowly, lazily like the clouds in my memories and shone light across her face in deep swaying motions. I watched the tears bud from her eyes and grow to her chin, she was afraid.

"Ssh, hush now darling," I cooed, "Frankie's long dead my dear. Those were the happiest times of my life back in the country with my dog and my family."

I paused, almost coming to tears myself at the sweet memories of my youth, "No!" I stammered, "You were the ones whoe destroyed it all, you cast down my cherished thoughts and stole them all for yourself, you and your people disgust me!" Rage was now welling within me, an uncontrollable rage. Anger scares most people, with me, at this time, with this person, anger feed the fear, and the fear became my rage. Fear of being wiped clean, eliminated, erased, no. I wasn't going to go like that, not like my dear dog.

I pulled the gag from her mouth, the barrel of my pistol insisted very strongly that she not scream. It seemed she was lead by fear as well, for she didn't scream. For that matter, she never did much of anything again; the trigger was lighter then I had thought, it was easy to pull. Red, scarlet, blood, everywhere. It was then that the laughter hit me, I was doing it, Frankie! I've got things under control now, you'll see, I'll make it right.

My Final Fantasy Job

Mediator You scored 27% physical, 20% magic, 44% versatile, and 61% good!

Your talents lie not in strength or magic, but your ability to get your way through talking to people (and sometimes other things.) You prefer to avoid fights and can often work your way out of them. As the name implies, you are also good at regulating disputes between other people, preferring peaceful resolutions to combat. But in a tight spot, you can also destroy enemy morale. You're handy to have around, but unfortunately there are times when talk will simply fail.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 13% on physical You scored higher than 2% on mystical You scored higher than 52% on versatile You scored higher than 54% on good

Link: The Final Fantasy Job Class Test written by Artscrafter on Ok Cupid

Work

Yeah, a 12 hour shift in the dead of night with nothing to do.

It's going to be a boring as fuck night again.

If you're wondering about some of the colour and image changes, I'm slowly converting the graphics and code into something a little less ordinary. I do stress the word 'slowly' because I'm lazy.

CrossDressing

One of my friends seems to have taken to crossdressing.

Check it out.

What a very odd person he is.

Comments anyone?

420

So April 20th 2005 came and left again quite quickly. I'm sure everyone knows by now that Apr20th is also Internation Pot Smoking Day! Too bad I didn't get any marijuana to smoke on that day. The first year that I would have been in line to celebrate and I can't because of fucking work and money issues. Stupid fucking work.

Anyways, I don't anyone around here had much of a good time, so I guess I can be accompanied in my misery, if that's really any consolation at all.

Random Prattle

Yeah, just feeling a little random today after the night of drinking and smoking marijuana. It was a normal Saturday night, but when you're hanging around with four people who are on extasy and you aren't, it's kind of a buzzkill. Oh wel, it was fun while it lasted for those few hours before everyone started getting hit with the effect really hard. I've sign up for Nexopia for some reason, I think I was told to by a friend. I'm not sure why I did it, I mean, what can Nexopia do for me? Nothing I bet...

Nothing at all.

Untitled

The plodding monotony of the drip soon made itself very clear in my mind as I snapped from my trance-like state. It's was completely silent in the room, save for that drip, I wondered what it was as I noticed a salty taste in my mouth. It was dark, but I could still make out the unmistakable scarlet now staining my fingertips. What had happened I wondered, why was there blood in my mouth? I glanced down upon my form and noticed the same scarlet staining my shirt, it was like a dark crimson beacon trying to remind my what I'd done. My mind was too warped from whatever had happened to clue in however, as I refocused my eyes about the room, familiar shapes started to creep out of the shadows. This was my apartment... I've lived here long enough to recognize it in the pale light that refracted in through the small window.

All was silent and calm, except for the drip... Looking around myself I realized I was not the source. A bit of exploring in the blackness proved to me a horrible event had just occured. There was a body forming out from the shadows, it hung silently in the darkness, swaying ever so slightly in some unfelt draft. I cried out in terror, but the words from my mouth were foreign, the were my words and my voice, yet somehow it was all distant. I approached the body, my footsteps echoed throughout the apartment. I thumbed my pocket for a source of light and found a matchbook. Quickly I snapped one to life and cried out again, this time in anger and fear. Once again my voice seemed to fall on ears that would not hear it, the light provided to me the last emotion scrawled across my dead sister's face, despair.

There she was, my baby sister, hanging from the ceiling of my home, gutted like a flounder. Vengeful thoughts took my already weakened mind as tears seemed to streamed down my face. Who had done this? Why? I felt the last moments of pain that were deeply engrained within her wide eyes. It made me almost sick to see one loved so dearly in a condition like this. I screamed in rage, but once again my voice seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere. The last moments of conciousness were fleeting, as the match burnt out, so did my will to live, and so it was that I was taken from life.

Jorb!

Well, I did actually manage to find a job, go me.

Hopefully it'll be decent enough, working security at nighttime. It's not like this is a very dangerous city, it's fucking Canada for god's sake. Well, I'll report back to you after the first night of work tomorrow. You being the losers who are actually reading this of course.

As always, bacon and circumstance.

Being Poor...

Being poor is easily the worst affliction known to man. I think I'd rather have AIDs and Cancer before I'd choose to be poor. Unfortunately as with serious fatal diseases, you don't get to pick when they happen. I've come down with a pretty bad case of 'having no money' for about the past month and it's a real pain in the amusement centre of my brain.

Haven't been able to party in over a month, haven't left the house except to look for work in over a month. It's just god damn rootin' tootin' depressin'. I'll be on my way out in a little bit to borrow a pack of smokes from a generous friend who's just cured his poorness with a healthy dose of payday. Man I miss paydays...

What to add?

I've been looking at my blog a lot lately, wondering exactly what should be added to improve it, I'm already planning a graphical overhaul to make it appear prettier. However what kinds of links and things should I be adding here? Perhaps a bio page detailing my life, maybe a page dedicated to my writing?

If you've got any suggestions feel free to drop them off in the comments box.

April First

Well, another year another bad April Fool's day, I hate having to navigate through all of the crappy April Fool's jokes that the various websites I visit have set up. It just angers me to the point of rage and fear. Can't we just delete this stupid 'holiday'?

Routers

Yea...

I've had a Linksys router for the past two years, funny thing it it doesn't seem to like to work all of the time. Couple of days ago my router decided it didn't like the ports we were using for our home network and felt it would be a good idea to go fritzy on us.

An hour with Linksys Tech Support later couldn't discover the problem, so I tried changing the ports we were using, originally using ports two and three. We now use ports one and four. The only odd part about the whole experience is that fact that port one didn't work when we moved into this place...

Strange happenings indeed.

Internet Radio

I've been thinking about music a lot lately, in the past I was never a huge music fan, I think I own maybe ten CDs, and I got them through one of those BMG 10/$1 offers. My memory's horrible when it comes to artist names and song titles, I can usually recognize most music as having heard it before, however names just escape me. It doesn't really matter too much to me, I mean, if the music's good I should listen right? Of course.

Anyways, the reason I bring up the subject of music is because I'd like to turn everyone on to a great new radio station I discovered, it's an internet radio based out of Vancouver, Canada.

Radio Satan 666, plays some of the greatest hard rock and metal tunes of all time. It really depends on when you listen though, the different DJs are great and really know their stuff, I'd better stop writing about the station now before I orgasm all over my keyboard.

http://www.radiosatan666.com/

That's all for now kids, go check 0ut the station and listen to some good tunes.

So...

So...

Here you are, I don't update this blog a whole lot, but I may start. I've been thinking about it anyways. If you don't have Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater for your Sony PlayStation 2 video game console, get it. If you don't have a PS2, kill yourself. It's as simple as that.

I Live!

Man oh man, it's good to be back on the Interweb. Quick update, not that anyone is readng this; I moved in with some friends after trying it on my own for a few months. Just don't make enough money to keep up with everything by myself. I'm back now though, so you'd better watch out if you know what's good for you stinky bitches!

Had to move several large appliances today, too bad we didn't even have a dolly to help out. (For all you retards out there a dolly is one of those stand-up things with wheels on the bottom for moving heavy shit up stairs.) I do like the new place though even if there's less privacy living with others.

Work still sucks boner.